What is Cyclical Living?

Endings and beginnings with the winter solstice…

When winter solstice came on December 21st, 2023, I had grand plans. I usually do. One of my intentions for the upcoming year was to get in the rhythm of writing again. I’ve always loved pulling in in the winter months and mining the depths for insights and expressions. As quickly as the intention was set, the inspiration flew out the window to who knows where. The words weren’t there.

Winter solstice has become a complicated time for me, as it is for many people. I love the magic of the darkest day of the year. The glow of christmas lights, the smell of pine candles, extra cinnamon on everything I eat and drink. It’s a time of infinite potential. It reminds me of going deep into a cave and lighting a candle to see what ancient stories have been drawn there. Within those ancient walls, I plant a seed of intention for the future. I usually find it inspiring and motivating for the year ahead. 

This year, when I went into the cave it was like a cold wind of grief blew the candle out and there I was in the darkness. The anniversary of my father’s death has changed the sensation of this season for me. Part of me felt frustrated by that. I’m now starting my third year of grief and I can hear that part say, “Aren’t you over this by now?” But, if grief has taught me anything it’s surrender. Not in a passive and helpless way. I’m simply reminded that it is in grief that we can connect to our deepest love. And in the darkness of winter, we can find the most essential spark for a life well lived. When we start something new, we often are reminded of what has been. We grieve to honor and let go, we make space to call in more love and aliveness.

And so I mustered some courage and I sat in that darkness and I made it cozy. A blanket to keep warm. Healthy food and lots of water. Lots of patience. The spark of inspiration to write was renewed as I was listening to an energy meditation related to Capricorn season. The meditation guided me to the awareness of my bones. I could feel the solidity and structure of them in my body. Their ancient quality. The bones of our body are like the rocks of the earth. I felt immense gratitude for them. Amidst all of the changes in my life, all of the endings and beginnings, my bones have always been there, steady and strong. In that gratitude, I was reminded how passionate I am about the connection between our minds, bodies, and the earth. 

Connecting to the cycles of the earth helps us reckon with time and change in our own lives. The awareness of our mortality is primal and can be terrifying. As humans, we need a certain level of stability and consistency of resources. We try to control and predict as best as we can. Often, we take that to the extreme and it impacts our mental health. Some of us become over controlled and struggle to accept and flow with life. Others become undercontrolled and struggle to maintain consistency and commit to what we need. A few of us are blessed to experience both. 

When our need for control gets out of hand, it also impacts the health of the earth. We dominate the earth’s resources as if there is an endless supply. We over-control who has access to those resources. The earth offers us concrete examples of this, if we look closely. Winters are getting warmer, icier, and longer in Maine. Extreme weather events are becoming harder to deny. Watching the historic fish shacks at Willard Beach in Portland gently wash away into the rising ocean is surreal. Those shacks were a staple of time, consistency, and comfort for so many. But, the illusion that time never passes is being broken.

We are living out of alignment with the earth and it’s maddening. It doesn’t make sense. Our individual reactions to that are a spotlight on where our mental health may be suffering. And our individual suffering is a microcosm of how humans are suffering on the earth. But the answer is right in front of us. Nothing ever stays the same. Even our bones change. If we are going to live in better alignment with the earth, we have some listening to do. The seasons are one way that we can connect with the rhythm of time and space. Living cyclically is about honoring that rhythm, inside and outside.

So, this blog will be an exploration of the connection between mental health, our bodies, the earth, and its seasons. The opportunities and the challenges. We’ll explore ancient wisdom and practices alongside more recent science and social events. Reconnection can sometimes be painful because it reminds us how disconnected we’ve been. But, pain also reminds us that we are alive. And this time we have on earth is so precious and beautiful. My hope is that while we may not always feel better, we will feel more real, purposeful, and adaptable.